26 Dec How to Handle a Contested Divorce

Youโre ready to put that marriage behind you, but your husband or wife isnโt giving up so easily. The Law the Offices of Jeffrey M. Bloom can help. Divorces can notoriously get messy, but they get even more complicated when one person doesnโt want to call it quits. โContested divorcesโ are already brimming with animosity, and itโs your best bet to stay as collected and calm as possible (which is much easier with a reputable attorney on your side). Itโs not uncommon for spouses facing a divorce to try and hurt one another. This can be done emotionally or financially, such as battling for custody of a pet just to hurt the other personโeven though the person asking for custody doesnโt really want the pet. It can quickly become a battle that nobody will win.
When emotions start running high, bear in mind that your spouse (no longer how long you were married) is an expert at pushing your buttons. Retaliating will lead to a downward spiral. If youโre on the receiving end of verbal, emotional or mental abuse during a divorce, you canโt change the actions of your spouse. However, youโre in total control of how you react to it. Staying calm and ignoring what theyโre doing is best for you and any children which may be involved.
It can be a challenge, but there are ways to keep your emotions in check and ultimately speed up the fairest divorce proceedings possible.
The New Rules of Divorce
You should stay professional at all times, and not just when working with the court staff members and your attorney. Embrace a professional demeanor with your spouse, too. The less you react, the less likely they are to keep looking for a reaction. If you can, defuse all situations by answering questions quickly and abruptly. You may need to change the subject, orโif your spouse just isnโt cooperatingโsay that youโd rather all communication take place between your respective attorneys.
Sadly, in some cases, you might find out that your spouse is talking badly about you to your children. Resist the urge to further involve the children or to attack your spouse. Instead, tell your attorney and make sure not to exaggerate. Children shouldnโt be used as pawns in a divorce, and in some states, such an attempt is actually illegal. Donโt reciprocate, and never speak badly of your spouse to your children or in front of them no matter what. Remember: You may live in a state where that can lead to legal charges.
Take Turns – A Good Life Session That Applies During Divorce
A lot of what you learned in Kindergarten can actually be applied to divorce proceedings. For example, always take your turns, donโt yell, and answer any questions asked of you by the judge. Judges are very good at reading between the lines and can tell when one or both spouses are out to get one another.
Sometimes settling leads to the best possible outcome for everybody involved. If youโre interested, talk to your attorney about potential settlement terms. They will then present this to your spouseโs attorney, and perhaps an agreement can be worked out. This saves a lot of time, money and trouble for everyone. Whether your divorce ends in a judgment or settlement, be sure to follow the terms of the letter. Particularly in contested divorces, one or both parties donโt follow the agreement. If you suspect your spouse isnโt following the rules, tell your attorney and let the experts sort things out. Call Bloom Law Office at 855-208-3650 and schedule a consultation.